When I wasn’t Looking
The first place our deeds and lives are recorded are on the hard drives of our children’s souls.
There is a poem a bar mitzvah boy once read about his parents, entitled “When You Thought I Wasn’t Looking:”
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you hung my first painting on the refrigerator, and I wanted to paint another.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you fed a homeless man, and I thought it was good to be kind to strangers.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you baked a birthday cake just for me, and I knew
that you cared for me in the little things.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you said a prayer and I believed there was
a God that I could always talk to.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you kissed me good-night and I felt loved.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw tears come from your eyes and I learned
that sometimes things hurt – but that it’s alright to cry.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you smiled and it made me want to look that pretty too.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
you cared and I wanted to be everything I could be.
When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I looked … and wanted to say thanks for all those
things you did … when you thought I wasn’t looking.
How true! Whether we know it or not, our actions are recorded. Everything we say and do is being recorded by our children: the amount of charity we give, the excuses we offer for not giving, the comments we make behind the backs of friends, our business ethics, our moral behavior, what we eat, drink and watch on TV, the good deeds we do, the mitzvos we celebrate, the Torah we study, the books we read, the movies we watch, how we talk to people on the phone, how we react to stressful experiences—these and so much more are being recorded.